Fair Game
When pompous huntsman influencer Sigmar—creator of the ‘Sigmar Look’—is appointed Grand Game Marshal, he must turn his fake hunting fame into real trophies before the truth (or his prey) catches him.
CHARACTERS
SIGMAR SCHÖNWALD
Sigmar is the last in a long line of legendary hunters—or at least, that’s what his 230 billion followers on Hipstagram, Gloatr, and QuickFlick believe. As the inventor of the ‘Sigmar Look’ and the Neo-Yäger style, he’s been elected ‘Manliest Carbon-Based Lifeform’ in the Tellurian Empire—twice.
The Schönwald dynasty has served emperors for generations. It began with Sebastian, who fought under Emperor Prod Batoks and received the Kaiserbolt 9000—a custom-built precision rifle crafted by the finest engineers of the time. He was followed by Sibelius, Sigismund, and finally Sepp, Sigmar’s grandfather, who held the esteemed title of Imperial Gamekeeper under Brody 404, the Empire’s first AI emperor.
Sigmar inherited all their hunting gear and regularly poses with it—but has no idea how to use any of it. He’s perfectly content mewing, generating AI prey for his staged photos, and basking in his own magnificence. That is, until Kaiser Otto von Warp appoints him Grand Game Marshal—and suddenly, he has to actually hunt.
FLIB
Best tracker in the Tellurian Empire and Sigmar’s right hand. Or rather both hands, considering Sigmar’s utter ineptitude for hunting.
Flib runs a hunting lodge on his home planet Bogmire-7, catering to off-world sportsmen seeking ‘authentic’ swamp-hunting experiences. He supplies visitors with equipment, advice, and just enough encouragement to keep them from chickening out.
In the company of humans, he slips his six tentacles into old-fashioned uniforms, claiming it’s “for better inter-species relations”, but actually he just really digs historical Earth fashion and enjoys the dramatic flair.
Flib’s job is keeping Sigmar from dying—or worse, embarrassing himself. While he’s loyal (to a degree), he’s also sarcastic, perpetually exasperated, and fully aware that Sigmar is hopeless. He cleans up messes, puts out metaphorical and literal fires, and occasionally “forgets” to explain important things—just to see what happens.
EISENHARDT
Passed down through generations of Schönwald hunters, he was once a gun-bearer and field assistant. Now, under Sigmar, he’s been repurposed for a far more “important” task: carrying camera gear and taking influencer photos.
Eisenhardt’s 4D quantum compression torso allows him to store far more than his size suggests, making him an invaluable hunting companion—if he weren’t being used as a glorified tripod.
Though Sigmar treats him like a walking storage unit, Eisenhardt remains unfailingly reliable—responding to danger without hesitation, yet with zero urgency or reassurance. He does not comfort, he does not exaggerate, and he certainly does not pretend Sigmar is competent.
KAISER OTTO VON WARP
The larger-than-life yet oddly likeable ruler of the Tellurian Empire, Kaiser Otto von Warp insists on the title “Kaiser”—a nostalgic rejection of the endless squabbles and bureaucracy within the democratic empire he presides over.
A gentleman sportsman at heart, he is deeply passionate about hunting, though he rarely gets to do it himself. Instead, he sends hunters on extravagant expeditions to complete his legendary trophy collection, living vicariously through their exploits. His understanding of hunting is vast—but purely theoretical, as he spends more time discussing legendary kills than making any.
Impressed by Sigmar’s staged hunting prowess, he appoints him Grand Game Marshal, fully expecting him to bring home the greatest trophies of all time—completely unaware (or blissfully ignoring) the fact that Sigmar has never actually hunted anything in his life.
The World
The Tellurian Empire
Despite its name, the Tellurian Empire is not a dictatorship but a democratic body, complete with due process, endless bureaucracy, and all the inefficiencies that come with it. It is called an “Empire” not out of necessity, but because its founding planets thought it sounded cool.
The Tellurian Empire is a curious blend of modern technology and imperial grandeur, where smartphones and social networks coexist with baroque architecture, gilded uniforms, and unnecessarily elaborate etiquette. It is a universe where cutting-edge engineering is draped in the pomp and ceremony of a bygone era, and where function and form are always locked in a theatrical tug-of-war.
Zeps: The Imperial Dirigibles of Space
The pride of imperial engineering, Zeps (short for Zeppelin-class ships) dominate the skies with their elongated, elegant forms, evoking the grand airships of old. But unlike their primitive, atmosphere-bound predecessors, these ships surf the undulating tides of graviton currents, using a structure designed to harmonize with spacetime itself.
“Standard fusion thrusters? Primitive! With their elongated, tubular hulls, the imperial dirigibles ride the undulating tides of graviton currents, gliding effortlessly through the cosmos while lesser ships burn fuel like barbarians.”
The Zeppelin shape isn’t just aesthetic—it is crucial for “sailing” on subspace distortions, allowing for smoother, more energy-efficient travel. Even at FTL speeds, Zeps warp spacetime around them in a cigar-shaped bubble, giving them an air of effortless majesty, as if the laws of physics themselves bow to imperial style.
The Meisterjäger
A Wellenreiter-class ship with a lot of tradition. It has been used for the imperial hunt, and handed down over generations. A lot of generations. OK it’s a decrepit old clunker, but it’s Sigmar’s clunker and he finesses his embarrassment over the ship by calling it ‘vintage’, ‘Old Money’ and acts as if all its quirks and malfunctions were quaint features.
CREDITS
